nervous, excited and panicky

4th Year Anni - 17th Aug

Alvin and I have officially been together for 4 years, fruitful and eventful. On the 19th Aug, we have also known each other for 7 years. Its neither long nor short cos its still less than a decade. We didnt have a big celebration, but we tried to catch fireworks together, though it didnt happen. He was so sweet, he ask me to step out of the car to meet my colleagues for fireworks, while he waited for me in the car. We watch the fireworks together at different places, his messges are enough to make me feel that he was with me. We went to catch a movie after the fireworks, and had a simple meal to simply enjoy each other accompany.

Starting out as normal friends, we used to chit chat over the weekend till wee hours in the morning, and the weird thing is we hardly meet up. But we just have so much to talk about last time. I cant rem what we talked about, but we somewhat talk every weekend until he got attached.

Hehe nothing wrong with him getting attached then, coz our friendship has always been quite platonic, as i was attached too. It only happened in the later stage when i came back from australia and both of us were single. When we meet up there were sparks somehow. Its weird, its like getting together with a close friend, but it is a right choice that we decided to be more than friends. Knowing him for 3 years then, i know he is a very good bf, always giving in to his ex. haha being a friend at that time i felt that maybe some gals are not worth it especially the way they treated him was not very kind. So, as a friend i know how he works in a r/s , therefore i will somewhat be his first priorities if i'm his girlfriend.

Indeed, he has been treating me very well, took good care of me, and tolerating all kinds of tantrums from me, but me too also compromises. We both give and take, though its evitable to take each other for granted sometimes, but we all learned and try not to. I belive in horoscope, scorpio and gemini are not meant to be, but we are together and we are happy. I guess God arrange it this way so that we will live together lovingly for the rest of our lives. We hardly fight nowadays not becoz we dont talk, just that we learn to solve things in a nicer way without starting a big fight. We do have triffles but that's part and parcel of life.

We are moving on together to the next stage of our lives, yes we are getting married in less than a month's time. Right now i'm feeling the anxiety, many loose ends not tied and i'm somewhat at a lost of not knowing what to do. He is overseas again, so I better pull up my socks and get more things done asap. Hmm in a way i'm looking forward to it, but at the same time i wish i can get things up and running faster.

He is really one man that i can live with for the rest of my life and i hope it stays this way. I have faith that we will be happily married. Of coz nothing is for sure, but I know God will protect us, and we will cherish each other too.



Wedding Preps
Everything is okie, but like i say many loose ends. Havent confirm my cake, my tables arrangement, my ballroom deco, and most improtantly the schedule for that day! Haven't called a meeting to meet all the brothers and sisters. So many things to do... faint.. and i'm not sure if i left out anything. We haven't chosen our wedding march in song also and wedding vow...But we do have in mind what to choose :) All the "costumes" shd be ready, and just bought him new cuff links. Hehe bling bling and it matches his shirts well.

I really hope tat our wedding dun have to involve so many ppl, and dun have to worry abt how others think about our deco etc. Why is it that choosing our banquet table cloth colour also has to care for how others feel? Cant i be selfish and go ahead with what i think is nice? Cant i do that? sigh... i'm rather depressed now... I just want to have OUR own wedding and NOT everybody's wedding. Right from the beginning, from chosing of dates, flowers colour etc, we got to worry this and that.. why is it so???